My sister Lori sent me a quote by George Eliot (Mary Ann Evans), that I found relevant to my thoughts for today.
"There are few prophets in the world; few sublimely beautiful women; few heroes. I can't afford to give all my love and reverence to such rarities: I want a great deal of those feelings for my every day fellow-[wo]men, especially for the few in the foreground of the great multitude, whose faces I know, whose hands I touch."
I'm excited to teach my kids, particularly Miriam, about remarkable women from history. I want her to be inspired by Joan of Arc, Marie Curie and Amelia Earhart. But I also want Miriam to know that she doesn't have to change the world to be a remarkable woman. She is surrounded by inspiring women, whose stories and examples are worth celebrating today, and every day.
I asked five women, all from different countries and now embracing life in London, all mothers I've met at my kids' school,
"What difficulties have you overcome in your life, professionally, socially, or personally, so that you could accomplish your goals and make a good life for yourself?"
The main difficulty I had was the fear of change and what it would bring, not having a support network and starting from scratch was a scary thought. I can now say that I am happy I made the decision.
My partner is secure in his job, my daughter is happy in school and I have recently gone back to study myself.
Overall I feel it was the best decision and I'm glad I overcame my fear of change."
Being successful in my career was always so important to me but now after having my son, the drive I once had had dimmed slightly. I now use that drive I used to have for work in other areas of my life. Having a child gives you so much perspective. It changes you so much and all of a sudden what used to be so important is now hardly thought about."
I wanted to do research on museums. I started my PhD in Romania, but social sciences are not so developed there. My husband and I started our degrees together, but we decided to do it at two separate universities. The power relations in the family, in every family, conflict with the work relations. It is always good to have independence. I see work as a kind of freedom.
Kids. Every time I have had a child, money and prosperity came to me. It is not an easy thing to do to have kids and work. I must confess I have moments where I can not cope. But kids give you wisdom. For me it has been okay to have kids and to do my PhD at the same time. I don't think it is fair for women to be obliged to stay home if the family can not afford to pay for childcare. I think we are living in a world with too much pressure and too much competition. I think we should all work less, earn less, and spend less."
"I've realized in my life that many of the difficulties I face and overcome, are my own insecurities. They perpetually get in the way of my confidence, my willingness to try new things, my ability to make friends and my courage to be myself. I look too young. I have too many children. I'm not intelligent enough. I have too much. I have too little. I'm too religious. I'm narrow minded.
Moving to London has given me the opportunity to sink or swim. Daily I make a choice to stay isolated and protect myself from the [perceived] judgement of the world, or to live honestly and openly and allow myself to see, and really be seen."
I'm grateful for inspiring women in my life, those I know up close and those I know from a distance. I'm grateful to the brave women who were willing to share their experiences for this post, it takes courage and vulnerability. Like Evans - let's not reserve our reverence for the women who changed the world only, but let's give our love freely to those whose faces we know.